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Crap Film Remakes

 



Whiskey Coates
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Mar 2, 2012, 9:00 PM

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Crap Film Remakes Can't Post or Reply Privately

Watched the 2008 remake of 'The Day the Earth Stood Still' the other day. It was awful. Even more awful was Nicolas Cage in 'The Wicker Man'. Absolutely pointless. Just re-release the originals, it makes much more sense.


Jamesie
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Mar 3, 2012, 12:04 AM

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Post #2 of 21 (3175 views)
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Re: [Whiskey Coates] Crap Film Remakes [In reply to] Can't Post or

I kind of agree.... I-talian Job? FFS!!!!


buncranaboy
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Mar 3, 2012, 12:08 AM

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Re: [Jamesie] Crap Film Remakes [In reply to] Can't Post or Reply Privately


In Reply To
I kind of agree.... I-talian Job? FFS!!!!



Don't forget "Get Carter"

On second thoughts, do precisely that.............


Jamesie
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Mar 3, 2012, 12:15 AM

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Post #4 of 21 (3169 views)
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Re: [buncranaboy] Crap Film Remakes [In reply to] Can't Post or

And that Planet of the Apes remake about ten years ago?



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DonQuixote
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Post #5 of 21 (3159 views)
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Re: [Jamesie] Crap Film Remakes [In reply to] Can't Post or Reply Privately

The 39 Steps
Original - Robert Donat - very good
Remake - Kenneth Moore - not bad
Reremake - Robert Powell - crap

The Lady Vanishes
Original - Michael Redgrave - quality
Remake - Elliott Gould - oh do me a favour

12 Angry Men
Original - Henry Fonda - classic
Remake - Jack Lemmon - not that bad but lacked the atmosphere of the original

The Thomas Crown Affair
Original - Steve McQueen - some good moments
Remake - Piers Brosnan - I quite enjoyed it

The Texas Chainsaw Massacre
Original - No idea - Some serious scary shit going down in this
Remake - No idea - Not seen it but doubt if it could top the original

The Italian Job
Original - Michael Caine et al, but Benny Hill FFS???
Remake - Marky Mark, Donald Sutherland - Enjoyed this too




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Whiskey Coates
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Mar 3, 2012, 9:02 AM

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Post #6 of 21 (3148 views)
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In Reply To
And that Planet of the Apes remake about ten years ago?


I never did understand the ending to that one.

And I agree re: The Italian Job.


Mr. T
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Post #7 of 21 (3140 views)
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Re: [DonQuixote] Crap Film Remakes [In reply to] Can't Post or Reply Privately


In Reply To
The 39 Steps
Original - Robert Donat - very good
Remake - Kenneth Moore - not bad
Reremake - Robert Powell - crap


If we are allowed to offer TV remakes then the BBC's 2008 version with Rupert Penry-Jones must be included. A decent enough effort in itself but often even further from the book than any of the above and, being a BBC production, requiring a modern political slant. This was effected by inventing a character, a proto-feminist suffragette played (admittedly with some charm and spirit) by Lydia Leonard.


jimmyjazz
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Re: [Mr. T] Crap Film Remakes [In reply to] Can't Post or Reply Privately

'Bad Lieutenant' - why bother making a sanitised version? Crazy.

Agree re; Get Carter & The Wicker Man - classics that simply can't be bettered.


DonQuixote
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Post #9 of 21 (3109 views)
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Re: [Mr. T] Crap Film Remakes [In reply to] Can't Post or Reply Privately

I finally got around to reading the book in its original
Edwardian prose last year. It was harder going than
one of Runwell's match reports.
Thank God I had seen the film(s) first.




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Mr. T
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Post #10 of 21 (3097 views)
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Re: [DonQuixote] Crap Film Remakes [In reply to] Can't Post or Reply Privately

It's not that bad really, Don. Compared with Middlemarch, it's Enid Blyton and lots of queers to confuse the modern reader.


DonQuixote
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Post #11 of 21 (3089 views)
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Re: [Mr. T] Crap Film Remakes [In reply to] Can't Post or Reply Privately

Sly

Not bad but long winded with drawn out cameos. I can see why they
changed the original ending for the films now...




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UKPunk
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Post #12 of 21 (3047 views)
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Re: [DonQuixote] Crap Film Remakes [In reply to] Can't Post or Reply Privately


In Reply To
12 Angry Men
Original - Henry Fonda - classic
Remake - Jack Lemmon - not that bad but lacked the atmosphere of the original

The Texas Chainsaw Massacre
Original - No idea - Some serious scary shit going down in this
Remake - No idea - Not seen it but doubt if it could top the original

I totally agree with you re: the first '12 Angry Men' film. Not seen the remake.

I take it your comment about the original 'Texas Chainsaw Massacre' film being seriously scary was meant tongue in cheek?

Haven't bothered with the remake as I thought the original was crap.



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Mishi
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Re: [UKPunk] Crap Film Remakes [In reply to] Can't Post or Reply Privately

Presumably the remake of 'twelve angry men' was only done after th change in the 'double jeopardy' law? ;-)



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DonQuixote
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Re: [Mishi] Crap Film Remakes [In reply to] Can't Post or Reply Privately

Have you never read the 'Fifth Amendment'?




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oxpete
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Post #15 of 21 (3007 views)
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Re: [jimmyjazz] Crap Film Remakes [In reply to] Can't Post or Reply Privately


In Reply To
'Bad Lieutenant' - why bother making a sanitised version? Crazy.

Agree re; Get Carter & The Wicker Man - classics that simply can't be bettered.


Fred Zinnemann's 'Day Of The Jackal' is another couldn't-be-bettered classic.

But some idiot tried to with 'Jackal', starring Bruce Willis, so that girls might watch it.


Whiskey Coates
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Post #16 of 21 (3000 views)
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Re: [oxpete] Crap Film Remakes [In reply to] Can't Post or Reply Privately


In Reply To


Fred Zinnemann's 'Day Of The Jackal' is another couldn't-be-bettered classic.

But some idiot tried to with 'Jackal', starring Bruce Willis, so that girls might watch it.



Yes. And they put Richard Gere in it as well, as an ex I.R.A. good guy???? Jesus!

Being a John Carpenter fan, I thought the remakes of Assault on Precinct 13, Halloween and The Fog were pointless and totally crap. But someone saw sense when the idea of remaking The Thing was mooted, and they decided to do a prequel instead, which I thought was ok.


Runwell
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Mar 4, 2012, 9:20 PM

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Post #17 of 21 (2977 views)
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Re: [Whiskey Coates] Crap Film Remakes [In reply to] Can't Post or Reply Privately

Also a big Carpenter fan, and luckily steered clear of the Fog remake. Didn't they remake the Thing as well? Edit yes, sort of...

Quite enjoyed the original TSM, and although not scary was a cut above the others. Saw one remake about a decade ago which I think had Jessica Alba in it, and the Hollywoodisation of a low budget cult film is just awful.

Don't even get me started about Titanic. That LDC remake sank without trace with me.



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(This post was edited by Runwell on Mar 4, 2012, 9:21 PM)


Mek
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Mar 4, 2012, 11:38 PM

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Post #18 of 21 (2956 views)
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Re: [Runwell] Crap Film Remakes [In reply to] Can't Post or Reply Privately

Original - Nikita - Really Good Film

Remake - The Assassin (with Bridget Fonda) - didn't like it


Chris1963
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Mar 9, 2012, 6:41 PM

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Post #19 of 21 (2844 views)
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Re: [Mek] Crap Film Remakes [In reply to] Can't Post or Reply Privately

As someone who needs subtitles to watch any film the irony is that the more films appear on TV with teletext subtitles, the less interested in movies I have become. Films (and TV series) have become like the Arena stands at non-league grounds ie; they increasingly look all the same. Generally I only bother to watch a film on TV these days if it is old or made by a non-Hollywood studio. To make this point clear, the only really good films I saw on TV in the past 12 months were 'Exit through the Gift Shop' and 'The Arbor'. Okay, I know this thread is about remakes but all these Hollywood films look the same anyway. And sometimes they never bother showing the originals; for example, 'Death Race' is on all the time but the 1979 film 'Death Race 2000' (a more interesting and original film) never gets shown on TV.


Edit; just remembered that one of the most enjoyable TV film viewings I have had for sometime was about 3 weeks ago when an obscure 1973 British horror film 'The Vault of Horror' was shown on TV. I had never heard of it before but it had the priceless sight of Tom Baker (yes, the Dr.Who actor) running around panic-stricken, in the streets of Richmond-on-Thames (conveniently close to the Twickenham studios - this was a very low budget film) and earlier on in the same film there is a scene set in a distinctive street ('The Vineyard') in the same area and so I went to the area to look at it for myself, and found it virtually unchanged since when it had been filmed. If it ever gets shown on TV again, don't miss it!


(This post was edited by Chris1963 on Mar 10, 2012, 9:28 AM)


garethwrexy
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Mar 9, 2012, 6:45 PM

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Re: [Chris1963] Crap Film Remakes [In reply to] Can't Post or Reply Privately

lake placid 2 dire !!!!



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jon b
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Mar 23, 2012, 1:38 PM

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Post #21 of 21 (2599 views)
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Re: [garethwrexy] Crap Film Remakes [In reply to] Can't Post or Reply Privately

A remake which has been regularly proposed over the years and which I would like to see, would be of "The Dambusters".

Not so much because the special effects should be many times better than in the original, but to see how they coped with the code word transmitted by Gibson & Co at a key point in the story to signify the dam was kaput.

In the original the code word, like Gibson's dead dog, was the "N" word. Shocked

If you want to sample some more very un-PC attitudes, have a read of Buchan's "39 Steps".

 
 


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